Answers and Cartwheels in the Office

Back in January, I asked you guys to ask me any Questions you have and I'm embarrassed to say I only got around to finishing this post today!  This year has been a really busy one for me (outside my blog) so I haven't been giving my blog as much attention as I'd like to.

Before I get to the answers of the questions you Pretty Plonkers asked, I must share a story with you.

Yesterday was one of those days where you are running in top gear all day.  From the second I got up, I was rushing around like a chicken without a fucking head!  I was like an ADHDer on speed. 

After dropping Megan at school, then Kaylin at school, popping in to grab a few groceries at our local supermarket before work, off to gym to train at lunch time, doing cartwheels in the passage at work, collecting the mail from our post box, collecting Kaylin from school after work, off to football with Megan and finally off to Governing Body meeting at Megan's school. 

When I got home, I realised at some point during the say, I'd split my pants at the crotch and wasn't wearing any undies!  I'd been doing all these activities with a three inch split in my pants with my fanny hanging out.  I am mortifed!  It must've been those fucking cartwheels in the office. Never again!

and now on to yer questions...

YeamieWaffles asked
Where you would like to imagine yourself (in terms of career and home life), in the future, say maybe ten years time? In fact, I don't really know most of your present either when it comes to your job, could you maybe talk about it for a while?

In 10 years time I will be 50. Oh My Fuckity-Fuck – that’s depressing. I certainly hope to be still married and probably driving myself to drink or hard drugs, with two teenage girls  Probably dead broke because two teenage girls don’t come cheap and if they take after their mum, with my shoe fetish, I will have to take out a loan just for fashion.

With regards to work, I’m not the big career mum but I have a really busy job.. I work for a direct sales publication in advertising sales support working for 10 Sales Reps (all of them women) 11 if you include my boss (who is also a woman). The hours are great, I’m 5km from home and 1km from the girls’ schools. It;s convenient and I’ve been here for over 6 years. Most of the girls here have become good friends and my support system away from home. I love them dearly

The Frog Queen asked
Where is your favorite place to visit what makes you feel like "home".

My favourite place to visit is the South African bush. I prefer the mountains to the beach. So a nice wee quiet place where I can go and recharge my batteries, be at one with nature, be outdoors in the sunshine or laze by a pool.

Alex J. Cavanaugh asked
Where do you find the photos for your caption contests?

I’m forever hunting the interwebz for freaky shite. I know I’m a relentless weirdo. I also get bloggers sending me picutres to use in my Caption My Photo Competitions. Any suggestions for my up an coming 50th feature?

nitebyrd asked
Where are you from in Scotland?

Originally, a wee place called Bellfield in Kilmarnock, Ayrshire in Scotland. I lived there for 10 years before coming to South Africa with my immediately family in 1981. Yes I still have the accent and Kilmarnock is famous for Johnny Walker Whisky.

Nolens Volens said...
You gotta love the lack of balls on the hater. Would that explain the existence of Haters Anonymous? Oh! That's your question! ;)
Haters can go on hatin because I just dust it off. My motto is “You can please ALL of the people ALL of the time”. If you don’t like who I am, what I say, how I say it – MOVE ALONG swiftly, please. Don’t waste my fucking time.

jenette or more commonly known as "j" asked
Has your blog been a topic of conversation at work in a bad way, or prevented you from getting a job etc etc.

I don’t generally publicize by blog at work. Most of my colleagues know that I am an avid daily blogger and some of them have even visited. None have commented, though. I have a few colleagues who read my blog on a regular basis but I don’t mention the people from work here on my blog. I keep my work and my blog separate. I also cleaned my blog up about a year ago and drafted all my risqué posts for this reason. 

Mike Smith asked
Will you ever return to Scotland? 

For a holiday, yes but I doubt I would return to Scotland to live unless things in South Africa go pear-shaped and turn Zimbabwe on us. It's reassuring to know that I have a British passport and that my kids have British passports and that if we need to flee for any reason (criminal or otherwise) we'll be off in a flash.

cat asked
Does the hubby read the wee blog? And what does he think about it?
Hubby does read my blog from time to time but he doesn't read every post.  I often say to him "Did you read my post today?".  Usually the answer is no, but I think he's sick of me talking about  bloggers he doesn't even know. If I have a technical problem with my blog he's always will to help out.  Bless him!

The Answers to Yer Questions and speaks Afrikaans

You asked the questions...  I answered

Ask A Daft Scots Lass and Ye Shall Receive - A Vlog

This is a repost from last week because of the "Blogger is Unavailable" issue. 

Therefore all my comments for this post were DELETED!  Do comment again.


Some of you Plonkers may remember that I've done this before and didn't get a huge response.  

But now that I have some new visitors that pop in from time-to- time and a few more followers, I decided to do it again.  You never know, I may just get a few more questions this time.  Oh and coz I love vlogging.  Don't, you know it!!!

The deal is this - 

You ask me questions and I vlog the answers.  Simple as that.

So is there something that you've been busting to ask me?  Is there something that bugs the shit out of you, about me?  Is there something that you are dying say or make me do?  Here is your chance. 

Limited offer only...

Remember don't ask me to say Antidisestablishmentarianism.  Yes, it is a real word and yes, I do know the meaning.. I need that like I need a second crucifixion.

Ready?

Go!

(Nicked this from Gucci Mama.)

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Answers to Yer Questions

So, I asked my Blogger Friends to ask me any questions they had about me or things they wanted answered.  Here are my responses to y'all.

Matty asked:

Have either of your children ever said something or asked you a question that left you speechless? Like you didn't know what to say?

Megan has had some whoppers, but this particular story has very fond memories because it used to happen over and over again.

Megan must’ve been about 2 years old at the time and, every time we walked past a certain art store in our neighbourhood, Megan used to stop and stare at the naked statue of David that was on display out front.

One day Megan stopped dead in her tracks, as if viewing it for the first time, and declared: “Look Mummy that mans got a tail!” I nearly killed myself laughing but I quickly answered her back: “No, Megan that’s not a tail, that’s the man’s willy”.

“Oooooh!” she happily replied.

Every time we went past that shop after that, she’d stop, point and declare in her full-volume high-pitched two-year-old voice: “Look Mummy! It’s the man with the willy!” We used to get a lot of sniggers and smiles from the busy shoppers. Sometimes she’d even request to go past the shop just to see “The Man with the Willy”.

I’m pretty much embarrass-free now.

Becca asked:

How long have you had your blog?

I’ve been blogging since October 2007. So that would be just over about 2 and a half years. I have made some awesome friends along the way and I have learned a lot from my Blogger Buds. Thanx to y’all!!

Blasé asked:

After you and he met, how long did it take your present husband to get into your panties?

Firstly I don't often wear panties (as you put it).  I call them knickers.

My Boerewors and I have been together for 12 years now and we didn’t have a first date - we had a first shag. I was packing up to leave the country and go and work in London. It was my “last fling” so to speak and he asked me to stay. I did and we fell in lurve.

We did everything backwards!

Brian Miller asked:

if yday off, and no obligations...what would you be doing?

With two little active girl-children I really don’t get much time by myself but if there were no obligations, I’d love to be doing something adventurous. Learning to sky-dive or going on a hot air balloon ride or bungee jumping.

I love to get my adrenalin pumping.

Rick asked:

Favorite dessert?

That’s easy – anything chocolate.  I'm a serious chocoholic but my ultimate favourite is chocolate mousse.

Alan W. Davidson asked:

You, like myself, are Scottish by birth bud moved to a 'foreign' country at a young age...how closely do you identify with your Scottish heritage?

I'm not a teuchter or anything.  We're fae Kilmarnock so I'm a city girl just the same.

I was only 10 when I left Scotland but I still have the accent and I remember lots more than ye'd expect a 10 year old to remember.  I still blether very fondly about ma Scots heritage. I still get goose bumps and hae a good greet when listening tae the bagpipes.  I love square sausage, scots pies with mushy peas n gravy and Jaffa cakes.  Wheesht! Don't tell anyone.

I cannae wait until I have the funds tae go and tour the country and see all the things I dinnae get tae see when living there. All my extended family are still there but I do consider myself South African with a British ticket. I’ve been here fir almost 30 years noo but I'm still a proud wee Scot at heart. 

Lena asked:

Do you cringe or feel proud at the thought of the first record you ever bought...?

The first record I bought was a single (yeah, remember those little vinyl 45’s?) I bought Survivor's Eye of the Tiger. I’d play it full blast on my dad’s old record player over and over until I knew all the words. I was about 12!

So, no I don't cringe because I still love the song and I still know all the words.  I do have a few dodge vinyls from the 80's that I will leave stashed in the back of the cupboard for all eternity.

Vicky asked:

Why did you family choose SA to move to when you were 10?

Picture this - Scotland 1981, Princess Di was getting married and the UK was bang-slap in the midst of the British Recession. My dad couldn’t find work even remotely close to home and so he would be away from home working in the Shetland Islands, St. Kilda or on oil rigs and we never got to see him. Dad would be away sometimes for 6 months at a time. I think my dad came to the realisation that it was not a quality of life he wanted. He never saw his wife and kids!

We had friends that moved to South Africa and they helped my dad get a job to come to and we sold everything and left for sunny SA. It was a brave and scary move for our wee family.

When we stepped off the plane, I truly thought we were coming to jungle and people with bones through their noses. We didn’t know what to expect. All I remember from that day was stepping off the plane and being hit by the African sun.  The heat took my breath away.

If you missed the post and still want a question answered.  Leave your question below and I'll do another one soon.

Hope everyone had an awesome weekend.

Answers! Answers! Answers!

There were not that many questions for me...

otin said... You have been blogging over two years. Do you still enjoy it?

Yes, I still love it.  Its my way of escaping from it all.  Its also my way of sharing my voice with the world (not that you want to hear my voice...a Scots accent is an ugly thing.)


Sally-Jane said... Have you ever kissed a girl and if so did you like it ;-) and if not would you ever?

Yes I have kissed a girl and I liked it!  :-)  Thats all I'm saying.

What boys name did you have for if the girls were boys?

When I was pregnant both times, if it was a boy it was to be Nathan.  I wouldn't choose the same name now though.  Not that I'll ever be pregnant again...

One place you want to travel to before you die?

Italy - actually anywhere in Europe but Italy would be my first choice.

If you could do any job in the whole world what would it be?

A Journalist or doing something in Creative Advertising.


Laura said... What has kept you and your boerewors so close together?

For those of you who don't know who "My Boerewors" is, it is my pet name for my dear husband. And yes we are VERY close. 

We have had our fair share of ups and down in our marriage (espeically in the first few years) but the thing thats kept us together is our love for one another.

We respect one another - even in a heat of an argument we both believe in no swearing or name calling.  It breaks down your respect for one another and one becomes resentful.   We both work on our communication all the time and if we have a problem we talk and sort it out as soon as possible and for as long as it takes. 

We don't give something to receive in return - we give, for the pleasure of giving. We believe that it all comes back to you eventually.  We don't keep score.  I'm not just talking about material things here.  I'm talking about the little things in life.

We do fun things together and don't take life too seriously.  A good laugh can diffuse any situation..

We rely on one another to be there with the other one needs help, even if its just a hug or a friendly smile.  We stick up for one another!  We're a team and he's my biggest fan, even though I have a dimpled arse and I'm getting wrinkles - he still thinks I'm HAWT.

It sounds cheezy but love does conquer all - we've proved it - more than once.

What more can I say.  He's my precious BOEREWORS.