F....is for Friday and Freaks The Movie

F is for Fridays and with it, goes a number of things... Flash Fiction Friday 55, Fawk You Friday, FlogYoBlog Friday and Freaky Friday, which I will be reintroducing this week.  An old favourite of mine that some bloggers are asking to have back.

So here we go....

The awesome G-Man hosts Flash Fiction Friday 55.  Go visit him and give him some love and join hundreds of other bloggers playing the writing game. Try write a complete story in only 55 words…

Long Lean Legs that go all the way up

Long wavy golden Blonde locks

Perfectly French-manicured finger nails

Flawlessly painted toes

Smooth Honey-coloured skin screaming to be caressed

Rose coloured glossy lips begging to be kissed

Firm arse and perky ski-slope breasts

Soliciting desire

This is who I’d like to be - for a day.

Join Fawk You Friday hosted by Boobies

My Fuck You's for the week:

• To a certain bright spark at the office (I will refrain from mentioning names) but "You're a cock and a fuck-up. Any further complaints can be directed toward my fucking arse, where I'm sure you'll receive a warm response"
• Fuck You to the manager of our local supermarket who NEVER has my brand of cigarettes, no matter how much I ask him to get stock.  Why don't you come back to me when your brain's decided that it wasn't designed to be a shit box, okay? Run along now, Mr Spar Doochebag.
• Fuck you to the many boob-tube dresses I have and love.  God knows, I love how cool they are in the summer but, if I tramp on the fucking hem once more and my titties fall out, I'm gonna scream! 
• Fuck you to Dr Pepper that is stocked at one of our local shops (not made here in SA) but charged me fucking R12.99 for a small 330ml can.  Daylight fucking robbery... but I got one anyway...

I heart Dr Pepper

Go FlogYoBlog at Random Ramblings of a SAHM

Theme: Freaks,The Movie

 Can a full grown woman truly love a MIDGET ?

I'm rekindling the Freaky Friday posts coz I've got so much to share.  So many freaks, so little time...just the way I laaik it.

Freaks is a 1932 American horror film about sideshow performers, directed and produced by Tod Browning  with a cast mostly composed of actual carnival (funfair) performers including Schlitzie the Pinhead and many more...check the freaks out below...

Schlitzie was a MALE, but was always presented as a female because she had to be diapered and it was easier to care for her when she was in her Moo-moo



The Cast of  "Freaks"



Peter Robinson aka The Human Skeleton

Frances O'Connor - The Armless Lady



Prince Randian (The Human Caterpillar)
who was born with no arms or legs but managed to father five children and could roll a cigarette with his lips and smoke it.

Minnie Woosley aka KooKoo the Bird Girl

Olga Barnell aka The Bearded Lady

Daisy and Violet Hilton. 
Their biological mother sold them to the midwife shortly after they were born.

Only in AFRICA!

Yeah, you gotta have a sense of humour to live in South Africa. 


The taxi drivers are a nightmare - it could either push you to regular bouts of road rage, or drive you to drink.  The wildlife and scenery is a sight for sore eyes - enough to take your breath away and leave you speechless.  The lack of gammar, half-decent spelling and proper use of punctuation from the government, is laughable.  The Spaza Shops are plentiful and the resourcefulness of the locals is verging on creative genius.


But that is Africa and why I love it.

Hey!  At least they warned us

Spaza Shop

The irony...

Ostrich strolls into a Filling Up Station...

Crap!

Resourcefulness even in the Suburbs

The Enormous African Beauty making a Golf look teeny weeny

Visit tomorrow for Half-Nekkid Thursday

The Sun Has Got His Halo On! Hip Hip Hip Hooray!

The majority of South Africans woke up yesterday morning to see a ring around the sun, known as a sun halo.

It was gorgeous and so unusual.  Well, I hadn't seen anything like it before.

According to South African Weather Service meteorologist, Mksufhuwa William Msimanga, this is a very common occurrence.

“It happens when we have a high-level cirrus cloud. It’s located between 5km to 10km in the upper atmosphere,” he said.

Msimanga explains that cirrus clouds are filled with ice crystals and as the sun heats crystals inside the cloud, they move apart which creates the ring which is actually a circular rainbow.

It was really hard taking the pictures as the sun was really bright.  I just pointed my cellphone in the general direction and hoped for the best.

This was the result.



This phenomenon does not last long. “It should last as long as we have the cloud, but this particular cloud is starting to move away, so it should start to dissipate within the hour. It all depends on the momentum of the cloud,” Msimanga concluded.

Pricasso

There are millions of artists in the world but only one who paints with his Penis.  

And he's pretty good at it too.

Yeah, Pricasso paints with his Prick! 

Tim Patch comes from Gold Coast, Australia and travels the world dippin' his wanger in paint and swishin it all over canvas.

We saw him in action at the Sexpo a while back and I was fascinated.  He specializes in portraits and has even painted the Queen and Jacob Zuma.

Many established Artists have commented on the speed accuracy and the uique way Pricasso can paint. 

Astute buyers have expressed the opinion that Pricasso's paintings will see an incrededible appreciation in value due to the use of video as proof of authenticity, the quality, and physically he can only paint a limited amount due to the equipment being used.

Follow him on Twitter.

Zuma Portrait

Bloggers Ink Challenge Winner

Congratulations to Dazee Dreamer

All you lovely Bloggers voted her as

The Bloggers Ink Challenge Winner

Runners Up were: The Cupcake Lady and Muffin Monster

Thanks to all the Ink'd Bloggers for taking part.

Here Dazee shares her amazing Journey into her Midlife Crisis and getting her ink:

"Three years ago I turned 50.

I wasn't afraid to turn 50. I was happy. My kids threw me a surprise birthday party. And the biggest surprise was that they gave me a trip for 2 to San Francisco. Have I mentioned, I love my kids.

After my 51st birthday, I got the huge yearning to get a tattoo. Oh yeah, 51 getting my very first tattoo. Goes back to the "I'm a grown woman now, I'm doing what I want, not what my parents want me to do, not what my husband wants me to do". So I grabbed my friend Lizzie (Lizzie is now married to my son) and we went to the tattoo parlor that she had used before. Funny how a 20 year old girl could make me brave.

I walked bravely into the place and showed them the picture I had found that I wanted. Here is what it turned out to be. A daisy flower vine. From the minute I got it, I loved it. I felt so free and alive.

They told me, once you get one, you'll get the craving for another. Were they ever right. I thought and thought. What could I do. Ta-da, I decided to get a little butterfly for each of my grand kids. That way, as I get more grand kids, it would give me the excuse to get another tattoo. Looked up pictures of butterflies and went back. Told them I wanted them around the flower vine.

I was again, overcome with extreme happiness, when I saw my grandkids. The only bad thing was, it was the dead of winter. I had to wear long pants. I couldn't show my legs. This was going to be the longest winter ever!!!!

Made it through Thanksgiving, Christmas and New years. Uh oh, I'm getting the urge, the urge to splurge. I need another tattoo. And why should I just celebrate my grand kids. I needed to get one to celebrate my own children. Who, by the way, loved that I got the first ones. They were proud of me, of me stepping out and being my own person.

So I called them all, asked them what they thought of me getting a butterfly for them. They said it would be cool. I let them pick out the color they wanted to be, and the butterfly they wanted. Went back to my favorite place and gave them the pictures, told them which one was supposed to be which color and to do what they thought would look the best.

My daughter picked out the red butterfly. My oldest son picked out blue, and my youngest the green. I love how Amanda (my tattoo artist) put them as siblings united. And finally, the weather got nice enough that I could wear my capris and see them whenever I wanted. (please insert kid tattoo here)

Doesn't sound like too scary of a midlife crisis does it?

The thing is, I was raised to not deface my body. Not to do anything that would upset the parents. But, I became independent at the age of 51. Even tho, to this day, I still haven't told my parents that I got them. I try not to wear anything around them that they will see them. I hate confrontation. I don't want to hear the disgust and shame in their voice. My siblings, another story. Most of them know about them and have seen them. And say they are supportive.

I feel bad that I didn't start doing things for myself way before 51. I hate that until then, I always did things that I perceived would not rock the boat. That would not upset my parents, other than marrying a person that wasn't of my faith. That was upsetting to them. And from the day I married him 31 years ago, I've tried to do everything else that wouldn't upset them.

The one thing it did to me, was show me that I would never ever make my children feel like what they did was the end of the world. I know that we all make mistakes in life, and if we don't have a soft place to fall, we feel very alone.

And yes, I'm still with the same man I married against my parents wishes and I love him to the ends of my soul. I started feeling bad that I didn't have one for my hubby, so in June of this year, I went in and got one for him. Again, he didn't know. I wanted a really colorful one. And I also wanted his initials incorporated in it somehow.

Amanda did a perfect butterfly for me. Most the time people don't even realize that his initials are at the bottom. He loved it from the moment I got it.

My last tattoo was only a month ago. I feel like my life is all about comforting people. For some reason, they come to me with things that I would never in my mind tell anyone else. I always loved the picture of the 2 baby tigers but never "had a reason" to get it. Then my best friend and cousin came to me about her husband, and I have been comforting her. This is that tattoo. I got them in purple because it is my favorite color.

I also have to give a big shout out to my daughter, who has shown me that it's ok to be who I am. Who loves me even tho we went through a rough time, but who will always be my best friend. And to my 2 sons who have always been there for me, who don't laugh too hard at me when I cry during a sad commercial, and laugh at me often.

So if getting a tattoo is the worst thing I could have done with my midlife crisis, then so be it.

Thus started my journey into adulthood, at the ripe young age of 50.

An Amazing Story from an Awesome Woman with some
Brilliant Ink!!!