Four Score and Seven Years Ago...

Happy 4th of July to my yankie Plonkers.  I'm taking part in Paula's July Blog Challenge.  Go check it out.

We're on Day 4 :  If you could rid the world of one thing what would it be?

The Kardashians?  No, seriously....

I'd rid the world of addiction.  Whether the addiction is drugs, alcohol, food, sex, exercise, interwebz, smoking, gambling....

Addiction not only tears families apart, but changes the entire wiring of the brain.  Repairing the damage that addiction destroys, takes far longer than the physiological recovery. 

Five out of four people have trouble with fractions.

ca·si·no (prounced /kəˈsēnō/)

Noun: A public room or building where gambling games are played.

I detest gambling but I love people-watching.  And The Casino is one of the most fun places to do it.  Have you ever watched people play casino?  It's fucking hysterical because you almost always see these all of these characters as you walk through the casino floor.

The Slotter – The dittery old lady playing the cheap slots, clutching her handbag and her bucket of coins.  Mavis is wearing smudged orange lipstick and a trench coat.  She is hoping to either win a few bucks, or get some sort of thrill because her husband’s forgotten how.

The Addict - The dude walking around who looks lost and his eyes are about to pop out his skull.  He is about to gamble away his mortgage money and next week he’ll probably be getting a divorce and moving into a cheap hotel. The guy Suited Up so that he doesn’t look like the loser he is.

The Faker – This dude doesn’t know what the fuck he’s doing. He’s just at the casino to killing time before his next conference and hopes to get a few free drinks and pick up a hooker in the process. This guy is pretending to be single and carefree but he’s a family man with a clear wedding band tan. The Faker is usually hopelessly drunk!

The Cocktail Waitress – The good looking girl wearing the short skirt uniform carrying a tray full of drinks.  She is tired of being hit on a mistook for a hooker. She’s seen it all and just hopes The Faker is drunk enough to slip her a huge tip, by mistake.  She will go back to her one room apartment, count her tips and sleep until midday.

The Big Cheese - this bloke doesn't have the time to gamble for mere dollars, they need a stack full of chips and a familiar dealer. They could win or lose millions in just a few minutes, but the perks of BIG gambling are that they don’t have to sit next to The Addict, who lives and dies with every roll of dice.

The Dealer Swap – This is the croupier the casino sends in when the game table is getting HOT.  He slinks in quietly to the ruffle some feathers and break the flow of the table’s winning streak. Party pooper! Casinos do this on purpose!

The Bouncer – the dude who would rip yer face off if you looked at him the wrong way. He’s there for one reason only, to throw out drunken fuckers.

The Trump – this is the specimen throws money around like its toilet paper.  This FuckKnob wants to be seen and heard. He doesn’t care if he looses all the money in his wallet because he’s loaded and has just made $50 000 in the last ten minues. Sometimes he flaunts his crisp notes, just to piss off The Addict.

There you have it Casino Peeps.  Which one are you?

Anniversary At Gold Reef City Hotel, Casino and Theme Park

My surprise for my Boerewors for our 10 year anniversary was to spend the afternoon and evening at the Gold Reef City Hotel, Casino and Theme Park.

All furnishings in the hotel rooms are specially selected to reflect the charm and elegance of the opulent residents of the 1890's Johannesburg Gold Rush.

Our Room was called the Africa Room

My Boerewors spread eagled on the bed

The Dining Building

the Transport

Our Room Plaque

One of the many houses and shops on the street.

They even had a Chocolatier!!!

Can you say hand-made truffels with Belgiun chocolate and soopa yummy praline?

Female Tribal Dancers

Male Tribal Dancers

It was off to supper at the Casino where we did a bit of gambling and watched the Fifa Soccer World Cup team draw live on telly while enjoying a chocolate orange daquiri.

The next day, after breakfast, we went to collec the girls from Mandy (our trusty babysitter) and let them enjoy the fun at the Theme Park.

The kids when they found out where we were going for the day

The anaconda

The Miner's Revenge

The anaconda and the wild water rafting

The four of us on the kiddie's rollercoaster

The face of KK AFTER the rollercoaster

We also went to see a 15 minute long move in 4D which the girls really enjoyed - even when the seats jerked us around, sprayed water in our faces and blow wind up our legs.  We all looked soopa kewl with out 3D specs on.

Off to more timid rides!

The bumper cars (Megan's favourite)

Dragon Rides

Elephant Rides

Flintstone's Cars

Log Ride

Vintage Car Ride (Kaylin's favourite which we had to go on three times)

A newly hatched Megan

One of the kewl adult rides

One of the kewtest rides EVA!

The Tea Cups!

It was off to The Farmyard to look at the emus, monkeys, llamas, horses, bunnies, cattle, donkeys (the usual farmyard animals) and we came across four male tortoises taking turn trying to mate with one large female.  Poor ol' girl was just trying to eat her lunch while three hissy males tried to mount and hump her in full view of the children!  Shocking stuff....have you ever seen a tortoise's willy?  Its quite freaky...

A great time was had by all and it was a successful two days. Loved every minute of it!  Good laughs with my Boerewors and good times with my two girls who are now snoring on the cough, absa lootly exhausted.

Tomorrow I've promised the girls that we're finally puting up our Christmas Tree and Decorations.

Have a great Sunday everyone!