BlogFestivus 8th Day of Christmas

For those of you who don't already know, I'm doing the 12 Days of Christmas Blog Challenge hosted by Blogdramedy and we're on Day #8

All together now..

"On the 8th Day of Christmas my true love sent to me...


...8 Maids a Milking"

Now Plonkers, I don't do milk (not even in my beloved cuppa Vanilla tea) and I don't do maids, so I'd rather have 8 shots of Botox.  

This is actually a running joke (as opposed to a standing-still joke?)  between my hubby and I.  When my hubby asks me what I want for my birthday or anniversary or Christmas, I always say I want Botox and Fillers and he laughs at me!  

I am serious, demmit!  No jokes!

I'm incredibly pro plastic surgery, if it makes you feel better about yerself.  If I had my way, I'd shove and winkle myself to the front of the queue at The Extreme Makeover show.

After the Botox, I wouldn't mind some liposuction and a tummy tuck.  I'm serious! I'm not one of those women who want to age gracefully.  Usually it's the young and gorgeous that say that anyway.  I say, Fuck that, Bitches!  The technology is there - use it!   

Face lift for my Fiftith birthday, here we come (I guess I better start saving).

S-E-R-I-A-S, its really what I want for my next prezzie.  I shite you not. I'm not being sarcastic (for a change).

Anyone got some discount coupons for Dr 90210?

And so my 12 Days of Christmas Song resumes:

"8 shots of Botox
7 Priceless Plonkers
6 Penguin Biscuits
5 Gigs of Porn
4 Liverpool Blokes
3 Bronte Sisters
2 Jimmy Choos
And Jamie Oliver's Satay Chicken on a Stick"

Stick around until day #12 and you'll hear me sing the full song!

Cosmetic Surgery