Wednesday, 23 November 2011

Why are all the skinny, attractive girls Bitches?

So, Plonkers if you’re skinny and hot and don’t think you’re a Bitch, then you probably are! 

Offended?  Well, sorry but in most of my experiences slim, pretty girls know they are attractive and they fucking milk it. They milk it to the point of being a complete and utter narcissistic Bitch (but don't have the balls to be open about it) 

The Pretty Girl always seems to get away with murder and continuously gets the best seat on the bus.  

The Pretty Skinny Girl get drinks bought for them at bars – all night by strangers - creepy boys that are too scared to approach them and admire from afar.

The Pretty Girl bats her eyelashes, flashes as coy smile and catches almost any guy to do practically anything for her.

The Pretty Girl always laughs at your jokes no matter how pathetic, not because she wants to impress you, but because she doesn’t want to admit that she doesn’t “get it”.

The Pretty Skinny Girls don't have to try too hard, she doesn’t have to strike up intelligent conversation and sustain it for more than a simple rehearsed one-liner that her asshole-of-a-brother has drummed into her since she grew titties. 

The Pretty Skinny Girl doesn’t have to try too hard to get a bloke to be interested in her. The blokes she attracts already have her perched so high on a pedestal because of her looks.  The only Plonkers brave enough to come over are the arrogant assholes.
How BANGIN would it be to convince The Pretty Skinny Girls that slapping each other’s faces is the new high-five?

The Pretty Girl expects expensive presents and in turn they treat their men like dog shite. The poor bastards only stick around because she looks good on his arm at parties.  Doesn't everyone  stop to stare when the hot, handsome couple enter a room?

The Pretty Skinny Girl smiles sweetly to your face and the second you turn your back, she is rolling her eyes and pulling up her lip into a conceited sneer. Perhaps she thinks that bringing other people down will keep her on top?

The Pretty Skinny Girl thinks she’s all that and a bag 'o chips, but its only 50% of what she’s got and 50% what people think she’s got.

The Pretty Girl surrounds herself with girlfriends that aren't quite so attractive as she is, so she’ll always get first choice when it comes to pretty much anything.

The Pretty Skinny Girls are like the blind leading the blind. They have this unwavering admiration of their own beauty. They taken endless selfies, stare at photographs of themselves and kiss the glossy paper with their glittered pink lip gloss and display it on their photo pin board and draw a heart around it.

The Pretty Girl will steal your shine on your wedding day and ask the photographer for copies of her photos, because she reckons she looks cuter than the bride. She probably does - but, hello! It’s not your fucking day, Bitch!

The Pretty Skinny Girl says “I’m not a snob, ask anyone! Well, anyone who matters”.

The Pretty Girl likes to talk about herself constantly when on a date but not as much as she likes to talk about the inadequacies of others. Sad thing is, men pretend to listen but all they hear is "Oh Em Gee, blah blah blah blah blah", and are thinking, I wonder if she’ll put out after three drinks - or should I push it to four?  Four will guarantee me some leg-over for sure!

Och well....as my dad always says: "It's nice to be nice".  
But I prefer my motto, which is;  screw the shallow pretty, skinny chicks, deep down they’re all riddled with insecurities.

Chubby is the new Skinny, right?

A Daft Scots Lass and her Big Sista



30 comments:

Lost.in.Idaho said...

My girlfriend is a pretty skinny girl, and I think I know the secret.

They're always cold. She's shivering even in the summer, like a little chihuahua. When I'm cold I'm cranky. And she's always cold.

Now, she's mastered the art of turning the bitch switch off now and then. She's really friendly and kind, and has very little attitude. She doesn't take things for granted. But cross her and the bitchiness comes out in a bad way.

On a side note, have you looked at your GFC followers lately? I'm seeing a big pair of boobs on your followers list, and it threw me off for a sec...

Steve Bailey said...

Pretty skinny girls are shite in bed? I knew it wasnt me... and it was her!!!!

Bouncin' Barb said...

Works for me considering I'm a sexy hot plus size gal...haha

Dazee Dreamer said...

I freaking love your idea of the skinny girls high fiving each others faces. bwaa-ha-ha

And you know what else, if people don't like me because I'm fat, boo hoo to them, they are the loser!!!

David L Macaulay said...

lol - funny post that and mostly true as well, unfortunately

saratoday said...

I'm not offended; I just think this post is dumb. But maybe I'm too skinny to "get it." Nice job enforcing the idea that intelligent women aren't atractive - way to go!

A Daft Scots Lass said...

@Lost in Idaho I just removed those massive boobs!

@Steve now you may rest in peace.

@BouncinBarb Amen, Sister.

@Dazee *highfive* the regular way

@David thanx

@saratoday Why thank you!

cat said...

Oh yes girl! Amen! But you are anything but plump????

Akelamalu said...

Well being a voluptuous size 14 I agree with you. ;)

Mark said...

As a skinny pretty "girl", I'm deeply offended. I got lots of brains. And I scored high on my smartitude test.
Great post.
Your skinny(not quite)pretty(25 years ago, maybe)friend, m.

Joker_SATX said...

Sorry, but I am a lover of all women! What turns me off is the personality. I have had my share of Plus size gals that have the personality of a rotting avocado.

I have come to find that I have to get passed the superficial quickly and understand the person.

Thanks for posting your opinion however. I respect that!

SuzyQ said...

I like this post...but mostly, I understand the SPIRIT in which it was written.
I don't think you were try'n to cover ALL the personality issues of skinny OR chubby people...because you missed Skinny Ugly MEAN People :)
With that Adult perspective in mind...

If you can comment nicely without hinting your offended then comment.
If you can't...don't, you just proved the point of the post...*eh hem*... just say'n :)

You have an awesome blog Gillian! :)

Joshua said...

I'm not skinny, but can I still be a bitch?

jenette or more commonly known as "j" said...

I got your postcard last night! Thank-you!! The card was a huge hit :) haha. Chubby is SO the new skinny. LOVE the photo with you and ur sis!

Choleesa said...

Im a skinny bitch... just ask my fat sister in law!
Not ALL skinny bitches are stupid, just the blonde ones..
I dont sneer behind anyones back. I sneer to your face. That is what a true bitch does.
And Im pretty fucking good in bed too! I learned those skills when I was chubby.

The Accidental Somebody said...

I love that I'm not a skinny bitch. One of my favorite features about myself. :)

Monkey Man said...

I like curves.

The Glebe Blog said...

One time I bedded a skinny bitch,
she had no teeth and she had no tits.

No problems to me 'cause boy could she suck,
and her hairy pussy was as warm as fuck.

Aimee Katherine said...

...Have you got a grudge?

IndigoWrath said...

It's okay. Hot bitches marry handsome assholes, so it all evens out in the end.

Anonymous said...

Well, you say never censor, so here are my thoughts:

Here we have yet another land whale chewing her lips inside out with jealousy. Only, you've rationalised it inside your head that you're not jealous at all. You like to think you're curvy...news flash. It's not curvy. It's fat. So cute, reading all the other comments...'sexy hot plus size'? Brilliant! Plus size is not sexy; plus size is not hot. It's fat. It's blubbery, and apart from a few chubby chasers and men unable to access the hot slender chicks, most of mankind will agree with me on this one.

Beautiful, slim women will always be superior. You can attempt to comfort yourself, thinking they're 'crap in bed', to quote one post, but ultimately, a woman's ability in bed is ultimately driven by her attractiveness. If you've a size 14 or above, sorry gals, but your ability to give a guy wood is going to be severely diminished.

So quit kidding yourselves. Hatred towards beautiful women is going to achieve fuck all- it's not going to stop your husbands watching them when they think you're not looking. It's not going to take away any of the vast power they have in today's society.

My advice? Quit attacking your superiors and hit the gym.

A Daft Scots Lass said...

@Anonymous Superiors? I think not. So superior that you have to hide behind a pusillanimous "annonymous" comment.

A Daft Scots Lass said...

@Anonymous Superiors? I think not. So superior that you have to hide behind a pusillanimous "annonymous" comment.

The Glebe Blog said...

I agree with you D.S.L, if Anon. doesn't have a blogger account , he/she could still have left a name.
I do however think though, that there is too much obesity among western men and women. There's nicely rounded, then there are those who can no longer bring their heels together and waddle. At what point does a person, man or woman, reach a stage where they no longer give a shit about their appearance. If no one brings it to their attention, do they think they look OK ? A ten stone (63kg) woman is cuddly.........a twenty stone woman is fat. And tell me why do obese couples always walk side by side in the supermarkets ?
Regarding skinny women, in my youth I once had a skinny girlfriend, but she had the plumpest pudenda. I'd love to meet her again, I wonder how she looks now.

kyjones said...

Yes, because all skinny women are stupid and bitches. Makes TOTAL sense. Just because you are curvy and proud, does not mean you can put down women who are naturally skinny. Body shaming goes both ways - All bodies are beautiful does not only apply to bigger people but ALL bodies, meaning every type of body on the spectrum. Your idea of skinny women is incredibly warped. Categorizing people based on their body is a horribly close minded view. A person can be either kind or rude, smart or dumb, regardless of what they look like, and I hope that some day you can open your mind and realize this.

kyjones said...

Yes, because all skinny women are stupid and bitches. Makes TOTAL sense. Just because you are curvy and proud, does not mean you can put down women who are naturally skinny. Body shaming goes both ways - All bodies are beautiful does not only apply to bigger people but ALL bodies, meaning every type of body on the spectrum. Your idea of skinny women is incredibly warped. Categorizing people based on their body is a horribly close minded view. A person can be either kind or rude, smart or dumb, regardless of what they look like, and I hope that some day you can open your mind and realize this.

kyjones said...

Yes, because all skinny women are stupid and bitches. Makes TOTAL sense. Just because you are curvy and proud, does not mean you can put down women who are naturally skinny. Body shaming goes both ways - All bodies are beautiful does not only apply to bigger people but ALL bodies, meaning every type of body on the spectrum. Your idea of skinny women is incredibly warped. Categorizing people based on their body is a horribly close minded view. A person can be either kind or rude, smart or dumb, regardless of what they look like, and I hope that some day you can open your mind and realize this.

kyjones said...

Yes, because all skinny women are stupid and bitches. Makes TOTAL sense. Just because you are curvy and proud, does not mean you can put down women who are naturally skinny. Body shaming goes both ways - All bodies are beautiful does not only apply to bigger people but ALL bodies, meaning every type of body on the spectrum. Your idea of skinny women is incredibly warped. Categorizing people based on their body is a horribly close minded view. A person can be either kind or rude, smart or dumb, regardless of what they look like, and I hope that some day you can open your mind and realize this.

Michelle Watts said...

You seem to have had some bad experience with a mean girl or two. I'm sorry that has happened to you. Judging from your picture at the bottom of your post, you are an attractive lady yourself but this post takes away from that. You are indulging in the same unattractive behavior you have seen in other women. You may be happier by focusing more on yourself and what makes you happy instead of others. Just a thought. Bless.

original1graphics said...

Right on point. Preach brotha... : )

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