Thursday, 8 December 2011

BlogFestivus 8th Day of Christmas

For those of you who don't already know, I'm doing the 12 Days of Christmas Blog Challenge hosted by Blogdramedy and we're on Day #8

All together now..

"On the 8th Day of Christmas my true love sent to me...

...8 Maids a Milking"

Now Plonkers, I don't do milk (not even in my beloved cuppa Vanilla tea) and I don't do maids, so I'd rather have 8 shots of Botox.  

This is actually a running joke (as opposed to a standing-still joke?)  between my hubby and I.  When my hubby asks me what I want for my birthday or anniversary or Christmas, I always say I want Botox and Fillers and he laughs at me!  

I am serious, demmit!  No jokes!

I'm incredibly pro plastic surgery, if it makes you feel better about yerself.  If I had my way, I'd shove and winkle myself to the front of the queue at The Extreme Makeover show.

After the Botox, I wouldn't mind some liposuction and a tummy tuck.  I'm serious! I'm not one of those women who want to age gracefully.  Usually it's the young and gorgeous that say that anyway.  I say, Fuck that, Bitches!  The technology is there - use it!   

Face lift for my Fiftith birthday, here we come (I guess I better start saving).

S-E-R-I-A-S, its really what I want for my next prezzie.  I shite you not. I'm not being sarcastic (for a change).

Anyone got some discount coupons for Dr 90210?

And so my 12 Days of Christmas Song resumes:

"8 shots of Botox
7 Priceless Plonkers
6 Penguin Biscuits
5 Gigs of Porn
4 Liverpool Blokes
3 Bronte Sisters
2 Jimmy Choos
And Jamie Oliver's Satay Chicken on a Stick"

Stick around until day #12 and you'll hear me sing the full song!


Sub-Radar-Mike said...

I know you want it, but you definitely don't need it! Just my two cents :]

Xmas Dolly said...

You are just tooooo much! LMAO

Lesley said...

Oh I hear that! I am not going to be one of those grow old gracefully chicks!

W.C.Camp said...

You can do whatever you want but PLEASE don't fill your lips up with whatever Angelina Jolie or Lindsay Lohan uses - your husband will THANK YOU! W.C.C.

Not So Simply Single said...

Love it...

I would rather have 8 young studs in bed than 8 shots of botox...

just saying!

A Daft Scots Lass said...

@WCC Its not my lips I want to fill. Its all the wrinkles on my face!

@NSSS I'll see what I can get Santa to leave in yer stockings :-)

@Lesley can we high five, gurl?

@Xmas Dolly Too much of what? Bullshite?

@Mike thanx but I beg to differ, sweetie.

Julia said...

You're so right, technology is here for us and we are afraid to use it.
I think any person, not just women should do whatever makes them feel self confident, even if that involves Botox, Fillers or any other cosmetic treatment.

When I got sick of those forehead lines I searched for one of the best botox clinics in Toronto and had it done. I felt sorry I waited so much to take this decision because the result of my first treatment was amazing. The wrinkles were gone but I still had a natural facial appearance and for this I have to thank my doctor that took great care of me.
So if you really want to have botox or tummy tuck the only recommendation I have for you is to search for a good clinic with experienced physicians...this will definitely gave you the safety of a painless and effective treatment.

Mark said...

I'm right behind you in that Extreme Makeover Line. Sign me up!

Jene said...

Nothing wrong with plastic surgery, at all! Some of us weren't naturally gifted with voluptuous bosoms or desirable fat distribution.

I did, however, watch quite a few documentaries on tummy tucks, and they scare the shit out of me. Almost as bad as breast lifts.

Jolene Perry said...

You're hysterical.
That's awesome :D

blogdramedy said...

Isn't today's catch phrase embrace the technology? ;-)

The Glebe Blog said...

If you get plastic surgery you have to know when to stop.A friend of mine had that many face lifts,she now talks out of her arse.

bill lisleman said...

eight natural maids vs eight botox babes - oh it all comes down to personality - yeah right.


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