Friday, 16 March 2012

Fawk You Friday and a Shoegasm

TGIFF

Thank God It's Fucking Friday! Can I hear an Amen? CAN I HEAR AN A FUCKING MEN?

It's been an unbelievably hectic week for me, actually our entire family. I've been running around like a chicken without a head and I'm fucking shattered!

Fuck You to the fact that we couldn't celebrate my hubby's increase this week because we were so incredibly busy.
Fuck You the muscle spasm that kept me awake from 1am this morning. Will have to pop into the doc and get an anti-inflamatory shot today at some point. Pain killers do NOT work.
Fuck You to everyone who I flashed my fanny to yesterday. One of you could have at least told me or signaled me that I had a three inch hole in the crotch of my pants. F Squared aka Fanny Flasher is my new nickname in the office.
Fuck You to the rain that is going to ruin my Kaylin's Grandparents Day concert tomorrow which is outdoors.
Fuck You to my pumpkin that burnt to the bottom of my pot and I had to eat a piece of pizza that tasted soooooo fucking good but was my entire day's worth of calories.
Fuck You to the fact that I had to go back to work after such an amazing holiday. I could have easily stayed another week in those treehouses.

And now on to my true love - sexy heels. Take my button and share your pumps with me. Remember to leave a comment to tell me you linked up so I can come and visit you

Jean-Michel Cazabat At Saks

Whitney Suede, Leather and Patent Leather Colorblock Sandals

Thought I'd throw in the most adorable tote bag evar!

Love Moschino

This fifties style is awesome and the high heel sandals have my name written all over them.

Giuseppe Zanotti sandals

Gianmarco Lorenzi sandals

Love this little ensemble!!

Have a brilliant kick arse weekend, Plonkers.

Thursday, 15 March 2012

Answers and Cartwheels in the Office

Back in January, I asked you guys to ask me any Questions you have and I'm embarrassed to say I only got around to finishing this post today! This year has been a really busy one for me (outside my blog) so I haven't been giving my blog as much attention as I'd like to.

Before I get to the answers of the questions you Pretty Plonkers asked, I must share a story with you.

Yesterday was one of those days where you are running in top gear all day. From the second I got up, I was rushing around like a chicken without a fucking head! I was like an ADHDer on speed.

After dropping Megan at school, then Kaylin at school, popping in to grab a few groceries at our local supermarket before work, off to gym to train at lunch time, doing cartwheels in the passage at work, collecting the mail from our post box, collecting Kaylin from school after work, off to football with Megan and finally off to Governing Body meeting at Megan's school.

When I got home, I realised at some point during the say, I'd split my pants at the crotch and wasn't wearing any undies! I'd been doing all these activities with a three inch split in my pants with my fanny hanging out. I am mortifed! It must've been those fucking cartwheels in the office. Never again!

and now on to yer questions...

YeamieWaffles asked
Where you would like to imagine yourself (in terms of career and home life), in the future, say maybe ten years time? In fact, I don't really know most of your present either when it comes to your job, could you maybe talk about it for a while?

In 10 years time I will be 50. Oh My Fuckity-Fuck – that’s depressing. I certainly hope to be still married and probably driving myself to drink or hard drugs, with two teenage girls Probably dead broke because two teenage girls don’t come cheap and if they take after their mum, with my shoe fetish, I will have to take out a loan just for fashion.

With regards to work, I’m not the big career mum but I have a really busy job.. I work for a direct sales publication in advertising sales support working for 10 Sales Reps (all of them women) 11 if you include my boss (who is also a woman). The hours are great, I’m 5km from home and 1km from the girls’ schools. It;s convenient and I’ve been here for over 6 years. Most of the girls here have become good friends and my support system away from home. I love them dearly

The Frog Queen asked
Where is your favorite place to visit what makes you feel like "home".

My favourite place to visit is the South African bush. I prefer the mountains to the beach. So a nice wee quiet place where I can go and recharge my batteries, be at one with nature, be outdoors in the sunshine or laze by a pool.

Alex J. Cavanaugh asked
Where do you find the photos for your caption contests?

I’m forever hunting the interwebz for freaky shite. I know I’m a relentless weirdo. I also get bloggers sending me picutres to use in my Caption My Photo Competitions. Any suggestions for my up an coming 50th feature?

nitebyrd asked
Where are you from in Scotland?

Originally, a wee place called Bellfield in Kilmarnock, Ayrshire in Scotland. I lived there for 10 years before coming to South Africa with my immediately family in 1981. Yes I still have the accent and Kilmarnock is famous for Johnny Walker Whisky.

Nolens Volens said...
You gotta love the lack of balls on the hater. Would that explain the existence of Haters Anonymous? Oh! That's your question! ;)
Haters can go on hatin because I just dust it off. My motto is “You can please ALL of the people ALL of the time”. If you don’t like who I am, what I say, how I say it – MOVE ALONG swiftly, please. Don’t waste my fucking time.

jenette or more commonly known as "j" asked
Has your blog been a topic of conversation at work in a bad way, or prevented you from getting a job etc etc.

I don’t generally publicize by blog at work. Most of my colleagues know that I am an avid daily blogger and some of them have even visited. None have commented, though. I have a few colleagues who read my blog on a regular basis but I don’t mention the people from work here on my blog. I keep my work and my blog separate. I also cleaned my blog up about a year ago and drafted all my risqué posts for this reason.

Mike Smith asked
Will you ever return to Scotland?

For a holiday, yes but I doubt I would return to Scotland to live unless things in South Africa go pear-shaped and turn Zimbabwe on us. It's reassuring to know that I have a British passport and that my kids have British passports and that if we need to flee for any reason (criminal or otherwise) we'll be off in a flash.

cat asked
Does the hubby read the wee blog? And what does he think about it?
Hubby does read my blog from time to time but he doesn't read every post. I often say to him "Did you read my post today?". Usually the answer is no, but I think he's sick of me talking about bloggers he doesn't even know. If I have a technical problem with my blog he's always will to help out. Bless him!