Prank a Plonker or Two

With April Fools Day coming up very soon, 4 more sleepies!  I have a few ideas for you Plonkers to try on your family, friends or colleagues.  Oh I do love a good prank.

Do you have a ceiling fan with an overhead light that your victim turns on using a pull cord? Trick them by substituting a fake pull cord attached to a cup of confetti balanced on top of the fan blade. Most fan cords detach which will make this easy to set up, otherwise use a substitute cord and tuck the real cord out of sight. They will pull the cord and get a big surprise! Booyakasha

This one I'm actually going to try.  I've set it up just waiting for the nail polish to dry and find a unsuspecting victim.  *evil chuckle*.  Find a bottle of nail polish that you don't mind emptying out, get a piece of wax paper and drip the nail polish out.  Wait for it to dry and peel the wax paper off and voila.  Time to set it up for your victim to be pissed off you ruined her new coffee table or desk.

Replace the hand lotion in your victim's lotion bottle with mayonnaise.

Get a long spool of ribbon. Tie one end to your victims doorknob with a little note that says "Follow the Ribbon." Then wind the ribbon all around their room, bed, desk, even all over the house. At the end of the ribbon, attach a note that says "April Fools!"

Offer to make a sandwich for the victim. But don't remove the wrapper from the slice of cheese. When they bite down they'll get a chewy surprise.

This one is fucking tops if you have computer users in the office!

Use Windows Task Scheduler to send your victim mysterious messages. Many people aren't even aware of this program so they won't know where the messages are coming from or how to turn them off. To set them up on Windows 7: Go to Start; All Programs; Accessories; System Tools; Task Scheduler. When the program pops up, click on "Create Task" and in the "General" tab, give the task a name and description. Then click the "Triggers" tab, click "New," and select how often you want your message to pop up (I recommend every 5 minutes), and when you want the task to start and end. Lastly, click the "Actions" tab, click "New," and choose "Display a message." Type your message in the box below. You could simply put "April Fools!" or write "Ha Ha, you're a Fucknob!", or whatever you prefer to do. Click OK. At the specified times, your messages will pop up. NOTE: To reverse your prank, click the task name box for the message you created. To delete it, double-click on it and then look on the right hand side of the screen for "delete." It may not disappear unless you refresh it.
Now go and plan some priceless pranks on your favourite Plonkers and let me know how it goes.

Fawk You Friday, Shoegasm Shizzle and a Fizzy 55

So it's Fawk You Friday again!  Can you believe it?  Well my lovelies, head on over to Boobies, Babies and a Blog and link up.  Have some stinky cheese with your whine and let it all hang oot!

My Fuck You's this week:

Fuck you to my car's clutch cable that snapped in the middle of a busy traffic circle during rush-hour at 4pm in the afternoon just about 500m from my daughter's school.  All those fuckers peeping and gesturing for me to get out the way.  Where the fuck must I go when my car doesn't have a clutch and I'm on an incline.  Do I crawl up my own arsehole? Piss off!  

However, My Knight-In-Shining-Boerewors came to my rescue with tow car and tow rope.  Smart man!  I was in tears on the way home because I didn't know how to keep the rope tight without my breaks smelling like they were going to explode or trying to view all this through streaming tears.  

Story not over.  It happened again yesterday!  It snapped off mid-busy intersection and my Knight-In-Shining-Boerewors had to come to my rescue again.  He deserves a medal for coming to the rescue again, even though his wife was screaming down the phone at him.  I'm deeply sorry for taking out my frustrations on you!  I would rather evacuate my bowels in a public place than go through that again.


Fuck You to my stupid scale.  It hasn't budged since I started gym two weeks ago.  I thought I'd have lost at least 1 fekkin kilogram by now.  Urgh!  Keep plodding along on that Orbitrek machine, gurl!

Head on over to G-Man and sign up for Flash Fiction Friday and write a complete story in 55 words.  Easy Peasy Lemon Squeezy.

Sugar Free and yet sweet

Dark and Lovely

500mls of soft,

carbonated black beauty

Caffeine and Phenylalanine  loaded

Nice constant Buzzzzz

4 kilojoules of yumminess

0 grams of guilt-free fat

40mg of Sodium that’s 2% of your GDA

GDA – Guideline Daily Amount

Recyclable Plastic Bottle

Chug it down

Aahhhh!

Coke Lite does it for me!

Its Friday's Shoegasm over at  Peace Love Appelsauce

Go Link up and enjoy all the Heels



$669 at FabCrush

Orange (my favourite colour) Louboutin Knock-Offs $142

For the up-and-coming Royal Wedding  from Irregular Choice

Irregular Choice GBP79.99

Irregular Choice GBP129.99

I wish someone in the UK could send me a pair of Irregular Choice shoozies.  I'm a SA Size 4 if anyone wants to surprise me for my birthday in June.

I couldn't help but throw in a handbag because its so damn cute from Irregular Choice for GBP79.99.  Boy, do they have the most adorable accessories or what?. 

Have a BRILLIANT weekend and don't do anything I would do.  Bazinga!

April Fools!

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