Caption My Daft Photo Competition #5

 

Its Toozday, which means its time to get your grey matter churning and concoct a witty and thigh-slappingly funny caption to my daft photo.  

Who knows, you could win a brilliant wee something from me.  Speaking of the "wee somethings", I'm wondering if the previous three winners have received their snail mail from me? 

If so, let me know.  Pop me a mail at adaftlass@gmail.com

Here's this week's daft photo to caption.

Go

 

I always start blogging with a clean post and a dirty mind. Now, Caption My Daft Photo, my Plonkers

I must admit Plonkers, I've been a lazy boring blogger since the hype and craziness of the A to Z Blog Challenge. I don't remember exactly when it happened, but I've lost my blogging mojo again.

I detest when this happens because it means I'll open a clean blog post and stare at it pondering what I should write about.

You can lead a horse to water, but a pencil must be lead.

Usually, I can write throw together a half-decent semi-funny post in about 15 minutes and bam! done and dusted.  I tell you the unpleasant truth, Plonkers.  I normally don't think too much about it, I just write down the words as I think them.  I hardly ever spell check (I know I'm guilty) and I am someone who does most things fast.

I walk fast, I talk fast, I blog fast.  Hey Fuckers, don't judge me.  I'm a wife and a working mum, with two wee lassies who have truck-loads of extra-mural activies, who need a mum's taxi to ship them around, always have semi-healthy snacks in her over-size (but oh-so-trendy) handbag and juice on tap from a container in the car.

I get up at 6am to feed the cat and 2 dogs, take them out to pee, wake up my girls, make the breakfast, make and pack their lunch boxes, make sure their school bags have all the necessary things they'll need for that day, including changes of clothes for after-care.  Make sure they don't look like orphans going to school by helping them get dressed, brush teeth, brush hair (knowing all the latest hairs trends helps) and all this before 7am.  Then I have about, oh, 10 minutes to get myself ready.  Thank God, I'm naturaly beauty.

I could go on and on about my typically fucking hectic busy routine during the day, but I will refrain from boring you to uncontrollable sobs and eating your own hair and shite.

When the FUCK do you think I get time to think about my next blog post?

Gimme a bloody break

Normal Blogging Mojo will return shortly.

Don't pressure me, okay

Right on to more pressing matters....

Caption this Doozie...

Caption My Photo Competition #34

Its Toozday, which means.... 

.....Da-da-da-daaaaah you need to caption a daft image of mine.

I didn't have a Caption My Photo Competition last week because of BlogFestivus but here is this week's cracker to caption.

Ready?

Go!

Caption My Photo Competition #25

Och aye, it's my favourite day in Bloggerville. 

Why, I hear you question?

Because Toozday is Caption My Photo Competition Day, which means you Plonkers get to caption my daft picture and open everyone's Felicity LaughBox. 

(For the Fuckers who don't know what this means..."Felicity" is a girl with a banshee shriek that can blow your fucking ear drums from a mile away with her cackling laugh that sounds like a pack of hysterical hyenas on heat).

Caption this cracker...I dare ye to give me a Laugh-gasm.