The piano is a monster that screams when you touch its teeth.

Monday again, Plonkers  *Urgh*.

Donchya just wish that there was ONE more day in the weekend?

Well, this week's Monday Music Moves Me theme is songs that you hear at weddings.  Now, I'm not going to play the usual crappy and fucking annoying songs like The Birdie Song and...oh yes I am!

This one was a HUGE hit at my wedding. I shite you not





Father-Daughter Dance







and of course no wedding is complete without the two old fucks with a bunch of politically correct group of Hotties

Have a Break. Have a Brit-Kat

Diamond Jubilee Fever is everywhere in Britain this weekend, Plonkers.

The crazy red, white and blue merchandise just keeps getting whackier - just the way I like it. The Union Jack is taking over the fucking world!  Next it will be Union Jack bog-roll.

Here's some of the pictures from the 86 year old Queen's celebrations of 60 years on the Throne. 

Love it!  I want

The Offical Diamond Jubilee Shot

Birt Kat

I hope I look like that when I'm 86

Hey Granny!  Want Some Earplugs??

British Tabasco?

Love the Wedges!

Nicholas Kirkwood Diamond Jubilee Heels

Diamond Jubilee Cupcakes

Harry Arrives for the Celebrations

Even the FurKids celebrate

Even Google is in on the Celebrations

Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.

It was Kaylin's Sports Day on Saturday and its always a fun day with loads of prizes and war crys.


Here's the day in pictures

Beginning of the Parade

The Parade

All the Classes on the field

The Pram Race

The Dad's Race

The Mum's Race - I had heels on so I couldn't race

Water Balloon Game

Shaving Cream and Cheetos Game

This Dude Took it VERY serious

Sisters

Some of the Grade Rs

War Crys

Grade R War Cry

Kaylin giving it her ALL

Some of Kaylin's Friends showing off their winnings

Such a fake smile but she was pissed off because it was time to go home.

And The Winner Is...

Firstly, Happy June!  This is my birthday month and I couldn't be more excited.

This week's captions were absa lootly fekking hysterical. Thanx for taking part, sweet Plonkers. 

This wee weekly feature that I started a year ago, Caption My Photo Competition, wouldn't be worth shite if it wasn't for all your FANDABIDOZI comments every week.  I look forward to it and find it totally irrisistible. 

I know I sound like a bloody broken record, but I think all your comments every week are incredibly clever and funny. I'm extremely proud to have the most creative and talented followers.

This week's winner is the  grins.  Here is what he captioned

It's too hard to knit a gun. Can I have my soap back?

Featured Friday Follower

<a href="http://gillianhefer.blogspot.com/"><img src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVoYj0Pjq-I1wJKpkV7PCQS5Ue7dIkVqDc24liceGz0G5NePqH2lbfU2qx0v9xorbStHtc_-Y281zQFzALJ9mbHcpNI5LYIHa7zzDhNy8I6oR2bdOVUZV2LyJZLxOES8HSHghjeg9gE3K5/s1600/Friday+Follower.jpg" alt="A Daft Scots Lass" width="400" height="137" /></a>

We haven't been following each other for very long, but from what I've gotten to know over the last few weeks, is that Mark is an awesome stay-at-home dad of three wee boys and is a writer.  Here is his interview with A Daft Scots Lass - I gave him a space on my blog and he calls me irreverent, cheeky bugger!

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Go visit his wee bloggy and say hi.

What do you think is the most interesting thing about you?

That I’ve travelled so much and seen much of the world (I’ve moved fifty-five times in twenty-three years :)What got you started in blogging?

Sept. 11, 2011 – I wanted to do something to commemorate the tenth anniversary of 9/11.
What’s one of your favorite things about where you live and what you do?

Live close to Pearl Harbor, Hawaii and love the history and culture of this island of Oahu.
If you could be something different from what you do, what would it be?

IF I’d known non-citizens could join, I would have signed up to be a U.S. Marine (in 1996 when I first came to America on my Green Card.)
What’s different about you?

I’m quite quirky and have absolutely no problems showing myself up, even though I’m in my mid-forties and should be more reserved
Your favorite place in the world?

Wherever my wife and three boys are.
If you had one day to live what would you do?

Watch the sunrise in one part of Oahu, have fun playing in the island and then head to Sunset Beach to well, watch the sunset.
What are you reading right now?

I’m always reading three books… right now it’s:

Oppression by Jessica Therrien

Pujols – More Than a Game – by Scott Lamb and Tim Ellsworth

First Daughter – by Eric Van Lustbader

What’s on your iPod?

I don’t use one – I’m addicted to Pandora.com and when I find a great song, I pull the video on YouTube, so I make my own lists.
Three random things about you.

Though I have moved more than most, I’m not in the Witness Protection program.

While I have no problems with selling eBooks, I will never own an e-reader – ever.

When I was eighteen, my dad (who comes from Holland) said it was OK for me to move to Amsterdam – and the rest is history
If you had to write a book or make a movie about you and your life – what would it be called and who would you choose to play you?

"Seriously, Dude?" It would be hilarious to see Owen Wilson or Ben Stiller play me.
Dinner with three people dead or alive. Who and why?

Author Dennis Lehane (Mystic River, Gone, Baby, Gone – he’s my favorite author (love how his mind ticks.)

Author and Talk Radio Host Dennis Prager – his wisdom and outlook on life is amazing.

U.S. Army Maj. Dick Winters (deceased) (Maj. Winters was the original C.O. of Easy Company – made famous by the HBO series, Band of Brothers.)
In anyone’s shoes for a day and why.

Winston Churchill – how did he make the decisions that saved England from Hitler’s Germany??
Who’s your hero?

Anyone wearing the uniform of the United States Armed Forces.
What could you NOT live without?

Apart from my family – books.
What is your dream job?

Writer
What would you do if you were a person of the opposite sex for a day?

Stay in bed (Seriously though, I would walk around town, and put myself in as many situations as possible so I could understand women better…)
If you could go back in time, what is the one thing you would change?

I’d shoot back to the 1600’s and turn the Irish and English into "Simply Christians."

As Simply Christians there would be no splintering off into "Nearly Christians" or "Sometime Believers."

This would spare both nations hundreds of years of fighting and killings and "The Troubles" would never have happened.
What is the one achievement that makes you the most proud?

That I’m a husband to my wife and a dad to three healthy, smart boys.
What’s your favourite color? And why

Sky blue…. Love the freedom it offers.
What makes you happy?

My boys giggling at something silly I’ve done (Holds up sign: WILL WORK FOR GIGGLES.

<a href="http://gillianhefer.blogspot.com/"><img src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjEBC5CjIzVFFAwjP98vng5gRchVZ3GR44PBZRCDDfXvD0zRrOOQVprxxvDJEweZyL44ZjLGKkjARFjcG3dw_TlWT-UMAG8KfXrz5tpmIZOmcxfUr_zXPfjHr8Zo_mKD05Fl7kcRlA-Z1c/s1600/fridayshoegasm.jpg" alt="A Daft Scots Lass" width="240" height="217" /></a>

And here's a bunch of shoes for today's Friday Shoegasm.

I just have one thing to say.  Why doesn't Topshop want to come to South Africa?  Oh how I wish to get my grubby wee hands on some of those items, especially the shoes.