Sunday, 7 August 2011

And The Winner Is...


And this week's winner is Wonkie.  Congratulations...

Thanx to everyone who entered the competition.  You make me laugh out loud on a weekly basis.  I think this may be my favourite feature!  The comments sure make me smile.

Now, those of you who have not sent me your photos wearing my AWESOME tattoos (oh you know who you are) - shame on you, Plonkers!  You should wear those suckers with PRIDE!

Be sure to come back on Tuesday for the next Caption My Photo Competition.
My superpowers? I can pee into a Coke bottle from 6 feet away - without spilling a drop. Bloody great hit at Glastonbury it was... what about you then - what powers did you ask for?"

Saturday, 6 August 2011



I was visiting over at Ma Nouvelle Mode and she is having a brilliant photo contest.  The photo you enter has to represent your summer. 

I thought immediately of the time we all had a go on our Superman Slip 'n Slide set up in our garden complete with soapy suds so we could go faster.  Weeeeee!  We had so much fun.  Loads of giggles and laughs and bruises!  I love summer - being outdoors, being kissed by the sun and long days and short nights.  Nothing puts a smile on my face like summer does.

I'm certain no photographer but I just love this shot I took of my youngest with my point and shoot Cannon.




Worthless Waffle....Even my reflection is jealous of me


People who ride on roller coasters have a higher chance of having a blood clot in the brain.


People with blue eyes see better in dark.


Money isn’t made out of paper, it is made out of cotton.


A tiny amount of liquor on a scorpion will make it go mad instantly and sting itself to death.


Chewing gum while peeling onions will keep you from crying.


A huge underground river runs underneath the Nile, with six times more water than the river above.


The USA uses 29% of the world's petrol and 33% of the world's electricity.  Energy Hoggers!


Wearing headphones for just an hour will increase the bacteria in your ear by 700 times.


The animal responsible for the most human deaths world-wide is the mosquito and they are ALL female.


Right handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people.


We exercise at least 30 muscles when we smile.


Our nose is our personal air-conditioning system: it warms cold air, cools hot air and filters impurities.


Our brain is more complex than the most powerful computer and has over 100 billion nerve cells.


When a person dies, hearing is usually the first sense to go.


There is a great mushroom in Oregon that is 2,400 years old. It Covers 3.4 square miles of land and is still growing.


German Shepherds bite humans more than any other breed of dog.


The pupil of the eye expands as much as 45 percent when a person looks at something pleasing.


Men's shirts have the buttons on the right, but women's shirts have the buttons on the left.


The reason honey is so easy to digest is that it's already been digested by a bee.


It cost 7 million dollars to build the Titanic and 200 million to make a film about it.


The sound you hear when you crack your knuckles is actually the sound of nitrogen gas bubbles bursting.


The only part of the body that has no blood supply is the cornea in the eye. It takes in oxygen directly from the air.

In Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes. When you pulled on the ropes the mattress tightened, making the bed firmer to sleep on. Hence the phrase "Goodnight, sleep tight".



In Scotland, a new game was invented. It was entitled Gentlemen Only Ladies Forbidden.... and thus the word GOLF entered into the English language.

Friday, 5 August 2011

Friday Follower #2 and A Shoegasm

Today's featured Friday Follower is BlackLOG 

Every Friday I feature one of my stellar followers because I dig ye and want y'all to play nicely...  Did I just say, y'all.  Holy Crap, I betta get my shit together...




The birth of the BlackLOG can be traced back to the summer of 1965.  Having survived an early scare, when its own umbilical cord attempted to strangle it at birth (some people feel this was a wasted opportunity to save the English language from years of abuse....)

Nothing much happened for the next 35 years except:

  • Breathing
  • Eating
  • Skiing
  • Lots of listening to music
  • Photography
  • Bad spelling
  • A very short illegal drinking stint (15 to 17.99999)
  • And a general massacre of the English language

Then a few years back, when running a Fantasy Football competition, a review of what was happening in BlackLOG world* started to seep out into the weekly results email. It soon became clear that people preferred the spewed output from a warped mind than an over complicated flight of soccery imagination. Eventually the competition died from lack of interest (I blame the world wide banking collapse for this) and the deranged outpourings were looking for a new home.....

* Not necessarily the same as yours but it has been validated as rational by the insane society, who would not touch it with a bargepole**

** Some would claim that this one act alone proves that the insane society really aren’t…. and they should stop mucking about with all that  putting underwear on their head and talking to trees -  who really wish they wouldn't, after all it saps their energy and stunts their growth***

*** The Insane society not the trees. The trees are just concerned about being seen with a bunch of nutters, since they attract myopic squirrels who failed to store enough provisions for winter....     

An accidental meeting with blogger 2½ years and the rest is a mystery....

As a closing note, I was asked to provide 50 words to cover what the BlackLOG is all about, seriously has A Daft Scots Lass not read the BlackLOG (hang on a second is that why she only ever comments on the first 50 words of the BlackLOG?) with its goal in life to eradicate all things twitter and the evils of short wording people (despite the fact that most people only want to be short worded****) after all The BlackLOG Slogan "Why say a well constructed sentence when a badly written novel will say it much worse".   

(Interject from A Daft Scots Lass - "Someone" should read their emails it was actually 500 words, Plonker!)

**** The BlackLOG has never claimed to be in step with popular opinion and I'm guessing if you have got this far neither have you...

Thanks to a A Daft Scots Lass for giving me some of her space - if she actually did - if you are not able to read this, what can I say but thanks for nothing.....

P.S. The BlackLOG is published once a week and unlike this drivel actually has an editor, Mrs B, who felt that the world was not ready for regular raw version and so sticks it in the oven at 180 for a couple of hours to burn off the worst of the excess….  Sometimes it almost works…  

P.P.S. You may have noted that I never did get to the point of what the BlackLOG is all about, which probably explains a lot more about it  than any words I could use…..  

The pictures (courtesy of Tourettes girl) contain, along with myself, the two most important contributors to the BlackLOG. First Mrs. B for services to grammar and spelling (something which I know or care very little about) and secondly The Beast who takes some wonderful pictures despite my worst endeavors...

 
Go visit and Spam his blog - leave something for Mrs. B too






Hey! Hey! Its Shoegasm Day! Grab my button and link up, Plonkers!  You know I love me some adorable shoes.  Here's this weeks installment. 

Polka Dot Bow Open-Toe Platforms

Button Down Ankle Stap Flats with Doodling.  Too cute!

Sexy Bubble Print Peep Toe Christian Louboutins

Cupcake Flats with Colouful Elastic Straps


Pretty Pastel Platform Pumps

Bottle Green Vintage Pumps with Embellisments and Buckles

Adorable Pink Ballerina Pumps. Love the foot ink too

You can even go and design your OWN shoes at Milk & Honey
I spent ages there.

Last chance to Caption my Photo Competition

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Thursday, 4 August 2011

Its Been Yonks Since I Got one of These Babies

I was over visiting one of my favourite bloggers ★Rockin' Mama★ who very kindly bestowed an Blog on Fire Award upon my wee bloggy.  

Gosh, Gee, Golly...I'm so incredibly flattered as I haven't received a Blog Award in Yonks!  Thanx, Destiny-with-Child.  You rock my face off, Skankalicious!  ♥♥

Usually that means you need to tell all yer Plonkers some random drivel that they don't already know about ye.  So, ready?

I'm forever on diet and NEVER thin!

I love Vanilla Yogi Sips.

Have I mentioned I hate winter?

My favourite colour is orange.

Phineas and Ferb are hysterical!

Raw meat gives me the willies.

Now go and stalk these awesome Hookers...

Skinny Bitches in the Making

Fabulously Flawed

Not So Simply Single

Absolutely Narcissism


Remember to go and enter my Caption My Photo Competition

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