BlogFestivus 7th Day of Christmas

On the 7th Day of Christmas my true love sent to me...

....Seven Swans a Swimming. 

Nah, its has been changed to Seven Plonkity Plonkers

Yeah, I'm talking about you fiesty Plonkers. 

Some of you have mentioned that when I call you Plonkers you feel insulted, it could not be further from the truth!  

It is definitely a massive term of endearment and its a word that I only use for YOU guys.

Och aye, only you wonderful peeps that read by blog, that comment on my blog and some of you that read but never comment and yet still come back get the honour of being called a Plonker.  Cherish it, like I cherish y'all. 

I think you folks are simply BANGIN!

Thus, My Twelve Days of Christmas melody matures to include YOU, yes you...

"Seven Priceless Plonkers
Six Penguin Biscuits
Five Gigs of Porn
Four Liverpool Blokes
Three Brontë Sisters
Two Jimmy Choos
And Jamie Oliver's Satay Chicken on a Stick"

BlogFestivus Half Way - Day 6

On the Sixth Day of Christmas my true love sent to me…

…Six Geese-a-Laying.

Hey Plonkers!  We’re half way through the 12 Days of Christmas Blog Challenge hosted by Blogdramedy and to celebrate I made a wee video.

Now, I don’t know about you but I’ve never seen a Goose laying, nor a goose being laid for that matter.  I’ve always been the doochebag running away while they honk at me and nip at my heels.  A friend of mine who had a farm, had Geese and she swore that they were the best guard pets ever!  They honk at any intruder and make a horrific noise - they chase you and bite you – bloody nasty Geese!  

Anyhoonk, back to my 12 Days of Christmas and so I will be switching it up to

“Six Penguin Biscuits

5 Gigs of Porn

4 Liverpool Blokes

3 Brontë Sisters

2 Jimmy Choos

And Jamie Oliver’s Satay Chicken on a Stick”

Fifth Day of Christmas - Blogfestivus

On the 5th Day of Christmas my true love sent to me ...


....5 Gold Rings


Well, I have other rings...erm things in mind for MY 12 Days of Christmas.  Oh yeah, you Plonkers know what I'm talking about.  Good old fashioned filthy porn!  


We couldn't....correction... I couldn't have 12 Happy Days of Christmas without a good fat chunk of porn.   


Gosh, this wee song of mine has taken many twists and turns, hasn't it just indeed.  Och aye, just the way I like it.  It wouldn't have "A Daft Scots Lass" stamp of approval if there wasn't as wee bit of saucy shoved into the pie.


Hence, the song continues to flourish and mutate its own swagger...


"5 Gigs of Porn
4 Liverpool Blokes
3 Brontë Sisters
2 Jimmy Choos
And Jamie Oliver's Satay Chicken on a Stick"

Happy 12th Anniversary and some Christmasy Photos

BlogFestivus Day 4 and Monday Music

On the 4th Day of Christmas my true love sent to me....

..Four Calling Birds

I’m not talking about budgies, I’m not talking about girls, I’m talking about song birds and that would be the most famous fab four ever, namely:  John, Paul, George and Ringo aka The Beatles.

I love The Beatles and grew up listening to their music as my big Skin ‘n Blister (sister) was, and still is, a MASSIVE Beatles fan. Thanks to her, I know most of the words to all their hit songs and  how to sing all the harmonies…pretty pathetic, I know.

So, I figured, seeing as its Monday and I usually do Monday Music Moves Me over at Xmas Dolly, I thought I’d tie the two together and, you know, kill two birds with one stone. I hear you groaning, Oh I know, it’s a “cheap” shot….(Kak Grap gaan sit in die hoek!)

Well, A Daft Scots Lass’ 12 Days of Christmas song now goes :

Four Liverpool Blokes,

Three Brontë Sisters,

Two Jimmy Choos

And Jamie Oliver's Satay Chicken on a Stick.