Yesterday I got a phone call on our landline at home.
I never get calls on my land line unless its my mum because firstly she's one of the few who actually have the number and secondly we mostly use it for the internet connection.
Anyhoo, Saturday afternoon and the phone rings and My Boerewors picks it up. I know immediately that its not my mum by the tone of voice he uses and the fact that he hands me the phone with a complete straight poker face.
and that's all I really listened to. The Bitch went on for ages yakking in a monotone voice about life insurance, insurance for my life insurance and whatever other fucking insurance she could blab about. Eventually I held the phone away from my ear because this Yakkity-Ann wasn't coming up for a fuckin' breath.
"Hi Mrs Hefer this is Janelle from Liberty Life. If I could have a few minutes of your time to tell you about ....."
I think they purposesly employ candidates with large lung capacities just in case you want to get a word in anywhere in the conversation. They hardly take a breath between sentenses and don't even wait for cues from you that you're actually listening.
Eventually, I put the handset down on the couch next to me while Liberty Fadoodle blethered on for another few minutes. Kaylin (my five year old) saw all this happening and took it upon herself to pick up the phone and say one word to Liberty Bagpuss.
Yebo means Yes in Zulu.
I couldn't stop laughing...
The annoyinng Fur Burger called back a few hours later to talk to me again and went through the entire schpeel again..
I SHIT YOU NOT!