Previously on A Daft Scots Lass.... Episode 3876 saw Megan and Kaylin entering life by way of vagina, which is as good a way as any to enter the world. Wee wrinkled newborns with a loud noise at the one end and no sense of responsibility at the other.
Well, Plonkers, look at them now! I can't believe how they've grown! Wasn't it just yesterday I popped them out my hoohah? Gosh, looking at how big they are makes me feel fucking old.
Even though I say that, I still don't see myself buying those white couches just yet.
Did you know that condoms aren't completely safe? A friend of mine was wearing one and got hit by a bus! I shite you not.
No seriously, for birth control now, I rely on my personality.
So this one is for the family overseas, including Uncle Jim that always stole my nose as a child. Now y'all can see what my wee lassies are up to.
Kaylin’s favourite things
• Mr Bean
• Her new gorgeous Tees she got from my in-laws all the way from Australia
• Kira Cheesies
• Cellphones (real or play ones)
• Cold Water from our new fridge water dispenser
• LMAFO’s :Sexy and I Know It" video
• Kissing our cat Pickles and Emma-Pup
• Shuffle dancing
• SYTYCD’s Jordan
• Getting her hair brushed or washed
• Hair accessories
• Brushing her teeth
• Fruit Juice
• To be told she can’t do something
Megan’s favourite things
• Being Captain of the Under 9 cricket team
• Toasted Cheese
• Breakdancing and Hip-hop
• Wearing her caps sideways
• Getting pocket money
• Taking photos
• Her own cellphone
• Her school uniform skirt
• Being teased
• Scary movies
• Anything girlie